It’s here. My bday party. I’m more excited and nervous about seeing HIM then my actual bday. After spending all day long getting ready, as if I was going to the Oscars or something, I’m finally ready! Or am I? What if he doesn’t show? OMG, I hadn’t even thought about it until now. My stomach hurts and I havent even started drinking…well not that much. Hey I’m nervous!
Once at the club, mingling with all my friends taking shot after shot I actually start having an amazing time and all my nerves go away. Where would we be without alcohol?!? But then it happens! He walks in, Be still my heart! He actually came! and he came alone-with a guy friend but in other words dateless, so alone. He comes up to me, gives me a big hug and whispers in my ear “you look as beautiful as always.” I can smell his cologne. The night went on and I decided I was having such a great night I wasn’t going to ruin it because he was there. I continued dancing the night away and he and I took a shot together, we danced, we interacted-just like I did with everyone else there. It was terrific.
The morning after wasn’t difficult. No regrets, no crying fits, I had a fabulous night and seeing him did not make me feel sad and depressed the morning after either. Was this a sign? Had i finally given up the hope of he and I and moved on? Or am I still drunk? Well I have no time to figure it all out now because I have to get ready for bday party #2. I’m unsure of what this means but I do know I have missed him, not just the intimacy or the sex (that’s obvious) but more so his friendship.